Saturday, September 13, 2008

Perineum? EWWWW!

I'm not an episiotomy fan. Is anyone an episiotomy fan? According to Wikipedia, the number of routine episiotomies performed has dropped in recent times, and thank goodness for that. The whole thing never made a lot of sense to me.

A good jagged tissue tear has lots of surface area, which means plenty of chances for the type of flesh-to-flesh contact that lets tissue knit itself together. Compare that to a nice straight paper cut made with a wicked sharp piece of paper...that takes ages to heal.

Of course, you have to take that opinion with a grain of salt because I am not a scissor-happy vagina slicer.

I just started reading a book on hypnobirthing lent to me by my good friend Jess. Thumbing through, I came to a chapter about things you can do to make birthing easier -- including, of all things, perineal massage.

The gist of it is that you lube up some fingers, stick 'em in your babby hole, and gently apply downward pressure to the perineal area. Uhhhh... Now I'm all for solo recreation, but the thought of massaging my perineum just totally grosses me out. The compromise? I asked the hub to do it for me.

Does that make me weird?


  1. lol! I did NOT need that image of you and Ted in my mind.

    You can also request the nurse/midwife does it at the time of labor, just tell them that you don't want an epi and you'd like them to lube you up to try to loosen the area so it's not necessary. They'll actually do that in some hospitals. *grin*

  2. I definitely don't want an epi -- I'm lucky in it's not something they do at the birth center. Like, at all.

    It would only be a possibility if I had a complication that meant going to the hospital, but then I'd have my midwife there to advocate for me.

  3. Really, not at all? I thought that they still did them if they thought you might tear really badly, like from front to back - if you know what I mean. I actually knew a woman that happened to..I would NEVER want to tear from front to back. *shudder*

  4. I'm not sure exactly what you funhole to doodyhole?

    Because that's icky!

    Maybe the midwives do it in the event of serious emergency necessity so they don't discuss it as a routine option?

    But how do they know if a serious tear will happen before a serious tear actually happens?!

  5. PS --

    (Something to bring up at my appt. on Wednesday!)

  6. Ask the hubby? Drat. What a phenomenal chore it must be to be him.

    "Honey? Could you please come play with my intimate bits for a bit?"

    Any respectably attentive (or, you know, breathing) dude I can think of would be halfway out of his chair halfway through the first word of that.


Show me some love!

Related Posts Plugin for WordPress, Blogger...