Tuesday, September 9, 2008

Our Birth Center Walk-Through

The hub and I are going to enjoy our formal walk-through of the North Shore Birth Center tonight. Then we're going to go get some delicious Mexican food! Guess which bit I'm looking forward to more...

Look, it's not that I'm not overjoyed that there is a person growing in my lower abdomen, but when it comes right down to it, it's me that's going to be doing the pushin' whether I'm at the birth center, at home, in the car, or in a hospital bed. The hub's gonna be nothin' but the cushion. Unless there's an emergency that requires pharmaceuticals or a c-section, I'm basically going to be winging it no matter how many hypnobirthing classes I attend.

Of course the hub's all excited and intrigued by the sights, sounds, and smells of birth -- he doesn't actually have to give birth. It's kind of like how I'm totally curious to know what it's like to be a high class prostitute. In my mind, it's totally glamorous and easy and not scary at all because, hey, I'm not actually a prostitute.

Anyway, I'm done worrying about the sorts of worrisome things one worries about during the first trimester, and I'm now worrying about other things. Turn off the worry faucet, you say? You obviously don't know me very well. Here are five things I've worried about lately:
  • Getting too fat
  • Whether or not to wear a shirt while giving birth
  • Autism
  • Saying mean things to the hub and my midwife while in the throes of labor
  • The flat spot my baby's head can develop if it favors one side
It beats worrying about birth defects. What's up with the shirtlessness, anyway? All but two of the mommas-to-be disgorging infants in the Business of Being Born opted to go topless, including Riki Lake. Of the two who chose to keep their milk jugs private, one wore a tube top and one wore a tank. Obviously, going au naturale is optional, but it seems like a popular choice based on the YouTube videos of chicks giving birth. Here is a photo montage demonstrating this phenomenon:


I give mad props to the ladiez who put their birthing vids up on the Internet. Tedd asked me if I wanted to film the birth -- before we found out that the birth center doesn't allow video taping -- and I was like, HECK TO THE NO. Who, exactly, is a video like that for? I don't want the world seeing me making ridiculous faces like I am trying to pass the world's most dessicated bowel movement.

4 comments:

  1. I believe the nudity/shirtlessness is to alleviate the extreme hotness one feels during long labors. At least that's my theory!

    We won't be having any videos either, although I desperately want Chris to photograph some stuff even if I do have a c/s. I mean..I don't want graphic images of my lady parts or my uterus..but images of the people working on me, of me sweating it out and straining or of the nurses cleaning up my baby are the kind of documentary style photos I'd love to see. It's not like I'll get to witness that stuff and actually remember it afterward. I think it's the inner photojournalist in me that makes these things desirable. *grin*

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  2. i happened upon your blog somehow and i was really enjoying it... then i realize you're using the same hospital! cool! i'm from gloucester, and i'm at 25 weeks right now. they didn't offer me a walk-through of the birth center :(

    however, i think i may be more comfortable in the hospital itself. i may want an epidural.

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  3. I just spotted this really old post linked to the bottom of your most recent post and just had to comment. Although I did end up with a cesarean, I managed to labor at a birth center for about 6 hours. In that time I was in various stages of undress thanks to my water breaking early in the day. I kept getting all wet and cold, and then I wanted to get in the shower, and then I couldn't be bothered to care who saw me naked. I gotta say that once I was in a hospital gown and not my own clothes, I felt a bit more comfortable. The c-section happened so quickly that the hubbyman missed it with the camera, and we don't have that first magic moment documented in any form. Now I wish we at least had a picture.

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  4. Word, Nikki. I ended up in a bra and hospital gown, in the hospital with a birth center midwife since I was early, and I'm not embarrassed about the choice view everyone had there at the end. What I am still to this day a little weirded out about was how LOUD I was. While making the faces I described above. I'm kind of glad Tedd didn't take a picture, heh.

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