Tuesday, July 7, 2015

A Few Things Only People With Long, THICK Hair Will Get

Recent humidity has me thinking a lot about my hair. And P.'s thickening tresses have me thinking about it, too. Recently I used a grownup size elastic on her 6-year-old pony tail and let me tell you that pony was thick. Poor girl is doomed to a life of hair that is EVERYWHERE unless she decides to go short. But she's had plenty of chances so far and loves her long hair like I love mine

And hate mine. Why?

How about that feeling of a long hair trapped in your butt crack on shampoo day? (Either in the shower or later in polite company when the hair decides to make its presence known.)

A strand or lock of hair will get temporarily stuck in your armpit on a hot day. Even better when it happens right after you've applied your antiperspirant. Good luck jogging in anything but a bun!

I can relate.
But that oh-so-effortless messy bun? Is a myth. If it's loose enough to look effortless, you're sticking a hundred pins in it. If it's tight enough to stay put, it looks like that tower in Dubai.

Hair stuck to your lip gloss. Hair sitting on your plate. Hair stuck in your shirt. Sometimes it's attached to your head. Sometimes not.

The shedding. It's like there is capellini everywhere.

Wind. Real or imagined! Open windows in cars. Bag straps. Coats. Buttons. Dance?

What the what is going on here? (That's moi, by the way.)
How about that feeling of your significant other laying on your hair wrong? And that it's somehow possible for YOU to lay on your own hair wrong. But if you sleep in a braid, you wake up with a headache.

Blow dry your hair? Yes! When there is at least a half hour available.

I call these "hair spiders"
Hair... or bug? Hair or bug? *frantically check* Oh, just hair.

Running your fingers through your hair should be a dramatic (or sexy) move you can trot out as needed but by the time you get from top to tips you have re-tangled your previously untangled mane.

So why don't I just cut it already? Simply put, because it's so thick that the length gives it the weight necessary to keep me from looking like a light brown mushroom. I am not even kidding - my level of body + shoulder length hair is a recipe for ridiculousness. That's reason enough to leave it long, as far as I'm concerned, even with all the hassle, needing two boxes of dye, and the... er... bedroom problems.

But honestly, it's all worthwhile when my hair game is strong.

Looking good!
Do you have long hair? Thick hair? Both? Or does the grass on my side of the fence look greener?


  1. Yep thick hair on this girl! In addition, I'm so blind that in the shower recently I had a mild panic attack when I saw what I thought was a spider that ended up being a hair tangle. Love this post, you so real!!!

  2. Vielen Dank für die hilfreiche Informationen.
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    HairVox Wirkung
    Hair Vox


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